Even within a tradition, everyone’s destiny is different but the power flooding through at elevation is of quite a different nature than what was experienced at 1*.
I can only talk from personal experience and speculate that the inner contacts made in the course of this second flush of power, play a role in shaping destiny and determining what direction the priest/ess will take, how and where in life it will earth and for what purpose.
In the initial stage, nothing happens on the surface but the waters below, having been stirred beging to produce a sucking vortex much as what happens when you unplug a sink.
That’s exactly it.
You start to sink and before you know it, you’re being sucked into a dark, dark funnel of waste. It’s anything but glamorous and glorious, I can tell you that.
If you’ve taken the 2* only, well, I figure that’s pretty much where you’ll be floating until someone will step forward and get you out of it by giving you a 3*. I don’t claim to know what it might be like because I took 2* and 3* together but purely by observation of 2*, nothing really dramatic happens to jolt into full wakefulness, rather a stage is reached where the individual remains suspended in some sort of neutral limbo and just bobs along with the current. Many 2* remain contentedly as such for an incredible amount of years.
The effects of 2*and 3* together, however, resemble more of a ping ball shot. The descent is rougher, faster and in the process you’re slammed right, left and centre, upwards and downwards while bungee jumping upside down. Imagine going through something like that literally and you can get a rough idea of the kind of altered states of consciousness you can get into by the sheer trauma of it all. Against all human logic – magic is beyond it – that’s the time to sever all ties and let yourself dive into free fall in true luciferian style. After smacking your head flat onto the densest sphere of the kabbalistic tree for good measure, just so that you get a good taste of the least evolved in mankind, you are propelled upwards and slammed in any and every direction in no particular pre-detemined order other than what you’ll need to muster what strength you have left to summon you HGO, which by then, you can be guaranteed, you will oh so need it.
This is where the qualities of the magical personality I mentioned earlier come into play. If you allowed yourself to be trained in servility and subservience, if all you ever learnt was to be dependent on someone to tell you what to do and when, how to behave, it’s not surprising you’ll either be kept on hold for the rest of your life or you’ll go cuckoo.
People imagine the awakening to be some sort of jaw gaping ecstatic experience of fucking unicorns and rainbows. Well, let me tell you, you might well see the rainbows and if you do, take it as a good omen and as a confirmation that somewhere along your magical way, you must have charmed some good ally into liking you.
Now, while not everyone nearly dies in the literal sense, a good number of people – including myself – come precariously close to one form of dissolution or another and the effects will be felt physically, especially if in your obsession with spiritual pursuits, you have neglected your body in one way or another. But in every single case, the person will suffer a severe battering psychologically, hence the ‘danger of going mad’. Again, your mettle is put to the test. If you’re the kind of person who’s easily plied and gives in, you’re fucked, because the road to recovery will seem to be nowhere near round the corner and even the strongest of people will feel like throwing the towel in at times. People around you may well be affected by it and feel the reverberations, so take that into account, as you might not have just yourself to nurse but everyone else who got dragged along with you because of you. Have you got the tenacity of spirit it takes to keep on fighting, and not just for yourself, while deeply wounded? Because that’s what being a Proper Person and having a magical personality is all about. Be prepared to learn about how your own actions and your own will affect others – not that it should put you off – because that will be your first taste of what it really means to feel compassion whilst wielding power to bring the scales back into balance. You will undoubtely be faced with some form of sacrifice or another, and I don’t mean giving up chocolate for lent or promise to the goddess you will never slag your enemies off ever again. Whatever it is, once offered voluntarily, unconditionally and moved by perfect love (not the sentimental airy-fairy kind) and in perfect trust – it will strip you to the bare bone and sink you to the bottom pit of humanity until you become NOTHING. Enter humility, because you’ll dwell in spiritual and psychological, maybe even physical coma for a while, and that turns out always to be longer than one had expected. Luckily though, if you have taken 2* and 3* together, you no longer need human intervention to get you out. When the time finally arrives, something, someone, a hand from the cloud, picks up up and you go from nothing on to being enthroned in some kind of position of power. This is when sheer driving force that brought on the elevation grounds like a thunderbolt and earth into manifestation in your life. Sounds like a happy ending, but that’s where it all begins, all over again, just on a different scale. And so here is that sword, like Excalibur in your hand again and this time you also have a heavy crown on your head and hovering over you a constant consciousness and awareness living in the memory of the experience you have had before. Flanking both your sides the pros and cons of your elevated position, your mentors and your critics, your supporters and your rivals or enemies; while below you is your HGO at your service and below still all that depends on your rule and how wisely and skillfully you hold your sceptre and wield the sword. You’re still surrounded by many but this time you can count yourself on your own, fully accountable and fully responsible, because if you made it this far, now you know how your every action and purpose will reverberate and affect others. You will have opened your eyes on both what is far greater and on to the basest of the base. What you have seen can never be unseen. Welcome, then, to autonomy and independence.
“It’s up to you now”, “You call the shots”, “You can do what you want”, “ You lead the way you see fit” – I am told. And you know what? Power is like a machine and runs on fuel. It needs action and force to drive it on. It needs clear sagacious vision, to aim and hit the target. It needs a direct and resolute voice that won’t be silenced by fear of disapproval. How are you going to forge ahead, if you’re the type that always needs to ask permission and surrenders to the will of a High Priest/ess and carefully watches every word they say in case they might be upset, offended or feel challenged?
Could it be counsel that you should have really been taught to seek? There’s a marked difference between the asking permission and asking for counsel. Because you see, the first smothers the magical personality whilst the former encourages its growth.
Which one of the two, do your Alexandrian teachers promote?
Are you being properly prepared to stand alone as part of your training or are you being expected to ego stroke and serve the High Priesthood in their delusions of grandeur and godly embodiedment? If the answer is yes, to the latter: are you sure there is any substance at all to their claims of High Priesthood? There’s a little too much emphasis on lineage these days as if that’s all there is to autenticity. Pity that this generation of newly appointed busybodies spend more time updating their fucking Facebook pages, stalking each other online and bitching in their secret weblists than to give any actual training.
What does becoming a god mean to them? What would be their reaction if you were to ask them this question? Would they think you’re being insolent? Would they feel challenged? If so, what in them brings out such defensiveness…an unmastered ego perhaps? Why would they tolerate being called bastard by Alex but not by you? Doesn’t the word bastard convey the same meaning, no matter from whose mouth it flits out?
On this account, like many others, I also think Karagan is a piece of shit and a proper cunt. Alex told me to pass on this important message last time I contacted his spirit – hope he and Jihmal get the sense of humour in this. Karagan does not mind me anticipating his secret revelation that he’s really the reincarnation of Alex Sanders about to return as King, because hey, did I ever mention that I am the reincarnation of Alesteir Crowley? What a jolly good fun it will be once we can find Gardner. I’m sure he’s out there somewhere. Jihmal, perhaps you could use your legendary pendulum…
Closed this little parenthesis of irreverent humour, any High Priest/ess who initiates and does not honour the commitment of training any one of their initiates up to their elevation cannot be considered a Proper Person. If you do not know what the hell you’re signing up for when you start a coven – wait, a Temple – and you even work magic to attract initiates, then I’m sorry, you are the living proof, along with all your lineage before you, that you are a half baked magician. Yes, you have an initiation and some training, pity about the magical personality – that obviously wasn’t encouraged in your lineage.
There are not such things as exceptional circumstances, only poor judgement or denial of responsibility on behalf of the High Priesthood. It’s like wanting a puppy for Christmas because they’re so cute and you so want to have a puppy and then abandon it on a street 6 months later, because it pisses and shits all over the house.
This is where I beg to differ in my method of discerning who I will/will not initiate. When I square a prospective candidate, all I care is how far does he or she dare to go to fullfil his or her desire? Do they take no for an answer? Big deal if I don’t necessarily like them on a personal level. What’s their magical potential? Least of all, I don’t need another sychopant with a burning desire to be Alexandrian, so long as they understand and accept that that’s the magical initiation and training they will be getting into. Unlike some, I do not expect them either to dedicate their entire life exclusively to the tradition. Many, myself included, shift and change tangents after their 3*. It would be a shame if they became stale water. Beyond the 3* the tradition is over. Even the Alexandrian 4* rite is a plagiarised incomplete rendition from the Adeptus Minor, so please, let’s cut this rubbish, Sanders himself spent his whole life foraging and scraping for knowledge. However, once you manage to communicate with your HGO, you soon realise that you can well get on with the Work without the parafernalia, unless you’re training. Again, if Karagan is still at the stage of “the Alexandrian tradition is so infinite to last you a lifetime”, he’s either deliberately deceiving seekers or he was never properly initiated in the first place (I know, Maxine knows and so do other elders in the UK know this is the case but the tradition needs a return of the King and guess who’s the fool in line for the job).